Ghost of The Past
by xLipstick
Summary: A ghost woman named Lillian Black shows up at Hogwarts to a curtain Harry Potter but she doesn't seem to get his attention and decides she needs to pick up this thing from both sides. HP/DM Slash


**Summary: **_A ghost woman named Lillian Black shows up at Hogwarts to a curtain Harry Potter but she doesn't seem to get his attention and decides she needs to pick up this thing from both sides. She shows the images of her own past and catches up with her own family in the present. Pairing Harry/Draco; Lillian/Jessie; Hermione/Ron._

**Disclaimer: **_I don't own any of this. Harry Potter, all characters and other things written here belong to JK Rowling. Story line is still mine; muwhahahahah if only this was in the real books huh..._

**Warning: **_This is and will always be yaoi/Manxman; don't like it don't read it and don't flame of my ass…_

**A/N:** _Don't mind looking up Lillian's name in the Black/Malfoy family tree cause she won't be in it; I just made her up and gave her some lovely name I just was of opinion that Druella Rosier was not the kind of name for a lovely young woman helping our saviours out. All other names are the ones in there but those are names everybody already knows._

_Lillian Black_

**Harry's P.o.V**

"Harry, Harry Potter?" I slowly woke up to the kind voice of a woman calling out for me. I sat up in my bed rubbing in my eyes letting them adjust to the darkness of the night.

I looked at my watch but I couldn't really make out what time it was, neither did I really care I just wanted to go back to sleep.

"Harry?" Again I heard the unfamiliar female voice calling me, but there was no on here other than my sleeping dorm mates. "Who is there?" I softly whispered scanning the room for any other form of life. Maybe it was my imagination or.., but before I could even thing of any other possible explanation as to why I was hearing this voice the ghost of a young woman wearing a beautiful bluish dress had shown before me. She looked rather familiar to me in her features but I had never seen her before. She wasn't my mother cause she had long blond sparkling hair and neither did she have my emerald eyes but deep grey ones.

"Harry Potter? You're Harry?" The woman asked me with a soft unsure voice indicating she was not entirely sure I was the one she was looking for. Still in thought of who she was I just nodded in her direction to answer her.

She held out her hand to now properly greet me. "Nice to meet you, I'm Lillian Black." She told me. I was astonished by the mentioning of the Black name; but she didn't remind me of Sirius maybe she was older than I thought. After all she was a ghost and there for she probably resembled how she had looked in her younger years. The way she had wanted to have shown to me. "You're related to Sirius than?" I asked her and I slightly blinked when saying his name thinking about how I missed him. She smiled at me. "He's my cousin." "But you look nothing like him. I would have recognised you if you even had the dark hair. But you do look familiar to me just not as a Black family member." I said knowing it was rude to just state things but Sirius and the Black family were a sensitive subject to me. But I understood she was put off by my sudden statement of her appearance.

She flew around me as if she wanted to say 'You look nothing like the people I know you are related to' but never the less she stayed and spoke to me. "He's the son of the brother of my husband. My real name isn't Black. I'm in the family through marriage. Even if I never wished for it." Her gaze travelled to the floor and her loving expression turned to a sad reminding one as if she thought back about the life she had lived. Then she suddenly looked up like she reminded herself why she was here. "But I'm not here to talk about Sirius or anyone from the Black Family. I'm here for you Harry. There are something's I've been meaning to show you." She gestured for me to follow her through the corridors of the dark castle.

She walked out of the Gryffindor common room and headed for the gardens I hesitated to follow her. "I'm not sure I'm supposed to be here? We are not allowed to leave our dorms at night let alone leave the castle all together." But I was only cut off by here continuing gesture to follow her. We stopped at the lake by a large oak tree. Lillian mentioned for me to sit down and she herself sat down beside me sharing a spot in front of the large green tree.

She sighted and looked at the lake and so did I. But she seemed to admire it and looked at the reflection of the moon. "It's beautiful isn't it?" I gave her a questioning look as to what she had meant. "The reflection of the moon it's so pure, so inhuman." I was totally confused by her words of small riddles pointing out the obvious in a 1000 piece puzzle. "The reflection it's the way the moon is up in the sky. There are no flaws or hidden parts to it. Just the way we see it, is the way it is. We humans are so keen on showing people who we are, not knowing if it's the way we really are. We hide things like emotions and feelings just for the expectations people have from us. Do you recognise yourself in that Harry?" But I was too deep in thought about what she was saying and how this had anything to do with me to even answer her properly. "You have someone special to your side don't you?" She changed the subject to try and regain my attention. I just shrugged "I've got my best friends Ron and Hermione." I honestly tried to answer her with more than the truth they really are special to me. "That is not what I asked my boy." The blond woman next to me just stated coldly making me think about what she had really said. Someone special other than my friends would be something like a girlfriend I supposed. "No." I just quickly answered because I didn't. There was no one to me and no one I really liked enough but there were enough people who were an option. "But there is Ginny everyone says she is a good girl for me and the sister of my best friend."

Suddenly the ghostly woman walked away seeming angry all of a sudden. Maybe I said something wrong and offended her but I wasn't sure. But then she walked back a little and began to rant. "See here you do it too. Telling me what people expect of you. Get a hang of yourself it's your life not theirs. Just yours. You make the chooses and you decide what is right. Not me; not best friends and little sisters. Just yours. You make the rules of your own world. If you keep this up you'll become what they are so afraid of becoming. And besides that you can put him out of your mind because that won't be happening if you don't show him." Without that she walked away and vanished into the darkness of the night. "Who are you talking about? Put who out of my mind?" I tried yelling after here but even if it seemed useless I could hear her voice vaguely in the distance. "You figure that out it's your heart yelling and screaming for his attention not mine. Just remember to be yourself and you'll get what you deserve." After that I couldn't hear or make out any of her words even if she had said some and every sound faded to nothing more than the silence around the lake.

I looked at the reflection of the moon shimmering in the motionless lake before me. I thought about what the woman had said and even if it had been so easy for me as she had suggested she didn't know what she was talking about. I had no one special to me, there had been Cho and some other girls but non really where how I liked a relationship to be and Ginny was nice but it just felt wrong if I ever dated her while she always had been like a little sister too me. More than that I didn't have. Well my routine life of getting up, having breakfast with my two best friends, being late for class in the morning, trying to get any fan girls of my back, listening to Malfoy calling me anything that comes to his mind to humiliate me and then there was the usual fighting with Malfoy which ended me up in allot of detentions. The only people I really had where Ron and Hermione and I really didn't love them any more than I did. They were practically my brother and sister. I sat down with my head against the oak tree behind me staying constantly deep in thought about what the woman had said, why she looked so familiar and why she even was doing this to me. Telling me all this nonsense about me not being myself. Ok maybe she was right at little bit. I had secrets even my friends didn't know, but who doesn't . Neither is there any point in telling them and they will find out on their own when they do. Besides that some things where too risky to tell anyone, think about something shameful being spilled into the wizarding world about me the ,one that is supposed to save the world. It would only cause trouble from the whole school body and maybe even the world and last to say trouble from that horrible Draco Bloody Malfoy giving him anymore reason to make fun of me. I was too tired to even think about it anymore. I really didn't care. I am who I am and I would hide what I thought the world didn't need to know. Slowly I fell asleep against the tree at the lake too tired to even walk back to the castle and feeling slightly comfortable in the still warm September night.

_"Mammy; look what I've made." A little blond boy who looked around the age of 4 pulled on his mother's arm eager to show her something he made on his own. "Isn't it beautiful." He said pointing to a little castle. It had 2 pointed towers on either side of it; a large ancient door and lots of rooms and windows. Before the castle was a huge garden which the boy had made of real grass and flowers spread across the floor. "When i grow up i want to life in a castle just like this. And you know what mommy? You can come and live with me together with grandma black." His mother looked proud of her little boy, she smiled and said. "What about daddy? Can't he come and live with us?" The boy looked a little angry for his mother suggestion what she just did. He folded his arms and spoke in his little voice. "Daddy is so mean sometimes; he just wants me to learn things and i just want to play i don't want to be all smart and became the way he is. I just want to be me, i just want my friends to come over and play with me but he won't let me." The mother looked sorry for her little one as if there was nothing she could do for him. "I'm sorry honey. You won't know it now and you can play all you like. But when you grow up he does want you to follow his footsteps. You're his only son; there isn't much for you to choose between so please be happy now and do all you like before it's really over." The small boy looked confused like he didn't understand all the words she had just said but he probably would when he grew up to be a fine wizard._

I was awoken from my little dream by the sound of people around the lake who were already wide awake. I looked around thinking about how I got here and suddenly remembered Lillian and how I had fallen asleep against the large oak tree. I saw two figures coming my way in a rapid speed. "What are you doing here Harry?" The brushy haired girl of the two asked. "You weren't in the dorms or so Ron told me and then Dean came telling me he saw you here by the lake." Still sleepy I rubbed in my eyes and tried to figure out what I was going to tell my best friends. I couldn't tell everything while Ron was around so I figured it was best to just tell them I came here to think some things through. "I couldn't sleep so I went out early and decided to sit by the lake for a change it's really quite here in the morning." I looked around trying to avoid Hermione's disbelieving expression. "Harry are you coming with me to the quidditch pitch for some practice, Ginny will be there too." Ron asked breaking the deathly silence between me and Hermione. As much as I liked quidditch I really wanted to talk to Hermione first and look some things up. "Thanks mate but I think I'll go to the library with Hermione instead. I still need to do some potions homework. You coming 'Mione." And I pulled her with me towards the castle leaving a stunned Ron behind.

As Ron left for the quidditch pitch Hermione and I walked to the library. She didn't talk at first but she knew something was going on she was too smart to not see or ignore it. "I take it you wanted to talk to me." Smart as she was to bring up a subject when she saw one she also never was afraid for any unwanted or shameful things. Besides that I never really went to the library with her rather than I needed her advice on something that wasn't homework. She knew almost everything and above all that I trusted her to keep everything to herself more than I knew Ron would. "Yeah I do. Last night I've been thinking things over about myself, the prophecy and the people around me. Do you think I act as if I'm not totally myself? Let's say that I live up to much to other people's expectations." She needed a minute to think about this which made me unsure about the whole subject. I was afraid she would agree to my theory or rather Lillian's. "To be honest there is something in that. You seem a bit absent lately. You're not the Harry I met in first year that's for sure. You look struggled sometimes by your own thoughts and the words of others. Maybe you just need someone around you." That wasn't a yes neither a no but it was more of an advice like Hermione always answered her questions with the longest road around them instead of straight away. "And don't even mention Ginny. I know how you feel about Ron wanting to set you up. Just ignore him and try to find someone yourself you know what or who you like don't you." She added as if she knew what I had been thinking seconds ago.

We kept walking towards the library in silence without even saying another word about it. Once at the library I went to look for some books trying to acknowledge more about Lillian myself. This made Hermione give me weird looks as if she had never seen me like this before. While 'Mione was writing her runes essay I picked up some large old books from the shelves. Minutes later I came back with a pile of books and put them on the table. "You're doing research on something?" She asked looking questioning at the pile of books before me on the table. "Something like that." I answered her opening the first book that titled 'Full Blood Family Trees'. Hermione reached out to pick up the next book from the ones I got but I stopped her in her track. "You need any help with that?" She asked at my reaction of sudden rejection. I hesitated as much as Hermione was my friend and a smart one at that I didn't need any one pulling me up on this, I could do this alone. "It's ok Hermione. It's kind of private. But thanks anyway." She got back to her work but she seemed to eye me all the time keeping me in sight while she wrote once again on her essays.

After 2 hours of looking up things I gave up on it. There was nothing I could actually find about Lillian being related to any one that was in Hogwarts. I keep in mind that Hermione was still her but I didn't want to bother her with finding someone's family tree. Neither did I think she had anything to do with this and ought to think of this as private. I left for the dorms to look for Ron and invite him for a game of wizard chess. I told Hermione goodbyes and made my way to the Gryffindor common room.

**Hermione's P.o.V**

Harry had left and I was way to curious as to what he was looking up. I put my own work aside and pulled his books together which he had left on the table in his hurry to whatever it was. All of the books seemed to be about full blood families. Beside the books was a little piece of parchment which read 'Lillian Black related to Sirius Black as a cousin'. So Harry had been looking up who Lillian Black was but why I asked myself. No need to ask questions to myself which I can't answer anyway now I'll have to ask Harry later when I see him.

Right now I had to look up who this Lillian Black really was and if she was important to any information I already knew. The rest would be my friends to tell. Within minutes I knew that Lillian Black officially named Lillian Gale was married to Cygnus Black; mother to Bellatrix, Andromeda & Narcissa. Through Bellatrix mother in law of Rodolphus Lestrange. Through Andromeda mother in law of Ted Tonks and grandmother of Nymphadora Tonks. Through Narcissa mother in law of Lucius Malfoy and grandmother of Draco Malfoy. With this information I bought the books back to their original shelves and was on my way to find Harry.

After finding an empty quidditch pitch meaning Ron had already left I was on my way to the common room to find my friends. Any other places where out of the question since they either played quidditch or where in the common room up in the tower. Once there I saw Ron and Harry playing a game of wizard chess which Ron of course was winning. I walked up to Harry and gestured for him to come and sit with me and mouthed 'important' to him. I heard him say. "Ron mate I need to talk to Hermione for a bit." and saw him coming my way. "Who is Lillian Black?" I was never the one to wait for a question or conversation I threw my questions to the table myself. "You've been looking up my work?" He seemed slightly angry and I could understand that but it wasn't my fault he left all his books open for me to read. "You left and I saw the books. Sorry for my curiosity. But tell me who she is maybe there is something I can tell you about here." Than he told me the story about Lillian and who she was.

"So if I'm right Lillian came to talk to you about what you asked to me earlier today?" I asked to confirm what he had just told me. He nodded in agreement. "She had been going on about me not being really me. And there was this thing about me having someone special. Kind of what you said. But you never mentioned a name or suggested a direction she did." I was confused, direction as to what? What was Harry talking about and why would it concern this woman who Harry would or wouldn't date? "Why would this Lillian woman make a suggestion to you? She either should be related to you but she obvious isn't or it has something to do with someone related to her." And then it hit me, Lillian didn't have a connection with Harry but she did have a connection with someone else in Hogwarts. Harry rolled his eyes showing me he knew that I had found something in the books. "And I take it you know something I don't." I nodded not saying a word. "But you're not going to tell me are you?" Again I nodded but I spoke too. "I want to know for sure first and I think it would be a wise word from your friend if you talked to "the woman again and asked her about things rather than assuming them from me and the books. If she had something important to make out she will tell you sooner or later." I had nothing more to tell and left Harry to think for himself. He needed to decide if he wanted to talk to the woman again but then he had to admit there was some truth in what she had said to him.

**Harry's P.o.V**

Hermione had just talked to me about that she knew something and I wanted to know too. I wanted to know what Lillian was here for, why she was sort of helping me see things through. Hermione had left me her to sit and think for myself, she knew I needed some time to decide what I was going to do. But I perfectly knew that if I wanted to know anything I had to ask Lillian herself without all the secrecy. But there was also the high possibility that she only would if I told her she was right and that I wanted her to help me. I need to find Lillian and sometime soon too but how. How did I knew where she was.

"Hermione!" I quickly called her back and she turned around. "How do I know where Lillian is." She smiled at me and seemed to think about what she knew probably from the books. "Try the Dungeons, she's a Slytherin at heart trust me on that one." Without even thanking my friend of telling Ron I would be gone for a while. I left the Gryffindor common room to look for Lillian in the dungeons like Hermione had suggested.

Once in the dungeons I didn't know where to start, the dungeons where like the biggest part of Hogwarts and had corridors that lead to the unknown. "Lillian?" I whispered calling out for her not sure why I was doing this but maybe it would work and out of nothing there she was. "Harry? What are you doing here?" Lillian asked her tone curious but somehow happy to see me again. "I need to talk to you. I want to know who you are before I accept any of your help. Well if that is what your here for, to help me?" She giggled in a sweet young woman's voice. "I knew you would come back. I saw you talking to the brushy haired girl she is quite the smart one. Can you pass on a message for me to her." I nodded but I didn't understand why Lillian would want to pass a message to Hermione about this. "Tell her she is right about what she thinks. And another thing I will tell you if you tell me that I was right about something. You have secrets for your friends, Ginny isn't the one you love and people do expect too much from you." She held out her hand for me to take in an agreement and I took it she was right and I didn't want to deny that. "You're right I don't tell my friends everything because I don't want them to hate me or hurt them, for Ginny goes the same thing I kind of pretend to like her for Ron. He loves the idea of us dating and well that does come to the thing they expect from me I don't want too." Again the woman gestured for me to follow her like last time but now she wasn't leaving the castle she took me deeper into the dungeons and stopped a statue of a large Dragon. "Grey Draconis." She said and the dragon moved aside revealing a corridor that lead to a large room. "This was my private quarters when I was at Hogwarts. Well I didn't get it but I rather found it myself so no need to think I'm spoiled by any headmaster or my parents. If you ever want to see me or if you need some time alone you can come here." I scanned my surroundings while in the room. It was not all green, like I expected any Slytherin room to be. It had many colours. The walls where green mixed with grey but the furniture where all kinds of reds and browns. On the wall where pictures and a family tree. But all of them looked very old and the family tree seemed to end at Lillian herself like from her side the family never bloomed on. "You do have a family right?" I asked pointing at the tree on the wall. "Of course I have children en grandchildren but I haven't seen any of them for a very long time. Still they are the only thing I have. But the tree never bloomed on because I didn't want it too. It's better this way. I won't get reminded of my mistake." I eyed her curiously and mentioned for her to go on. "I never wanted to marry Cygnus. He was nice and kind. He wasn't a bad person or something I just was in love with someone else and had been for a long time. But my family and Cygnus' thought it was better if we married. I had an arranged marriage. And never ever do I want to have that happening to any of my children or grandchildren again. That is why I let my own children decide themselves and gave them a choice for their own. But I could never make that decision for my grandchildren as my children and their partners do that. That is why I wanna learn you that you too have a choose whatever people say or want to see from you." I was quite for a while taking in what the woman had just again told me but this time about herself. But this didn't solve my puzzle; it only made it bigger by another 1000 pieces. "Lillian? What does your family have to do with me? I mean it's really nice and the last day I've been thinking about your words and advice but I'm not related to you or anything. I already know that." Frustrated the blond haired woman walked around the room right now she was the one who didn't know what to do. "Harry I kind of can't tell you. Your friend knows you get that but she won't believe what she had found out. Maybe it's your turn now to tell her something and she will tell you something in return. That is how things work. You'll be rewarded if you keep an open mind. Now go and talk to your brushy friend."

**Hermione's P.o.V**

"Harry where are you?" I asked myself getting impatient. I had been waiting for him in front of the portrait of the fat lady since I got the strange idea he was about to tell me something. The fat lady had been angry at me for passing in front of her for half an hour already. She had said I better could go inside and wait there instead of making her crazy with my step step turn walk.

Finally I saw Harry walking up the stairs, I pretended I was on my way down and walked towards him. "Hi Harry. I was just on my way down and ..." But I was cut off by him pulling me with him. "I need to talk to you. I spoke with Lillian. She told me what you're right about what you've found. Gods knows what she is on about but I'm sure you'll understand." I stopped in my track. Had Lillian confirmed that what I know and think that I'm right about that. No way that's too weird I thought. "Hermione you ok?" My friend asked and I nodded back. "This is just weird that's all." "What is so weird about it, you read the books and you put two and two together not me." I slammed myself to the head of course I did read the books but two and two made four not six. "Yeah but it's impossible unless there is something you're not telling me?" I joked to my friend, why would my best friend hide something like that from me. "Right there was something else I wanted to say to you but I doubt it's the same thing you're talking about." He looked to the floor and I gestured for him to go first. "Well... you know Ginny right? You said that I didn't have to make Ron happy and things if I had no feelings for Ginny. Well honestly I don't." I gave him a questioning look because I already knew that. "So? I knew that. Than what kind of girl are you looking for?" He gave me a weird look but didn't say a word he just kept eyeing me as if he was trying to tell me something telepathically. And then two and two became four. "You're saying that it's not a girl you are looking for? And you tell me now? How long have I known you Harry. You know you can tell me anything without me freaking out." But I was freaking out but not about what I just heard or didn't hear from my best friend but how the puzzle fitted together. "You're right 'Mione. But it's difficult to tell anyone. If this gets out. I'm screwed and not in a good way." I didn't know where to look right now I was in the most impossible situation i had ever been I had to tell my friend something cause that's how it works I owed him this one but I didn't know how. "Come inside the common room with me. I think you need to sit with me for this one." And so we did. I mouthed the password to the fat lady and we went inside. "We need to speak private because i don't want to spill this to anyone but you because it's about you." And I lead him up to the boys dorm room to talk in his room.

In the dorm room, I spelled the door shut with more than just one spell and sat down on Harry's bed and mentioned for him to sit down too. "First promised me that whatever I'm gonna tell you right now. You're not going to hate me or Lillian. Because it's not my fault and neither is it Lillian's in some sort of way." He nodded and sat on the bed moving impatiently. "First things first. You know there are ghost that stay here for a reason right. Well some of those ghost are lost and others have something to accomplish like Lillian has. She knows about what she has to do and feels that it's her duty to do so. That is why she gave the direction about who you love. She feels; she can see the emotions of the one related to her and connected them to you. So here comes the freaking out part. The person related to her is..." I took a deep breath this was going to be hell for sure. "Draco Malfoy." Milliseconds later Harry had jumped from the bed and was screaming at me. "You got to be kidding me right? Is this the thing Lillian wanted you to know? I really got to talk to her again." He was ready to leave but I pulled him at his sleeve. "You're not going anywhere mister. I told you it's not her fault and she is right. It doesn't matter you can't change it."

"Bet you I can if I hunt down Malfoy. That witch of a Lillian is so freaking out of her mind." He was ranting on about how impossible this all was. It was weird but after what Harry had told me the possibility had become stronger than it had at the beginning of the day. "Listen to me. You have a say in this. But what Lillian says is right, you'll see that sooner or later. You can either go talk to her and tell her she is right or you stay here and ignore her if you don't. You're choose." I gave him the only two possible chooses there where. Killing Draco Malfoy and screaming at Lillian why she was wrong where never an option of course. "Shoot me than; I won't talk to her again if you think it helps. But never do I want this to get to any ones ears cause than I won't be screwed, I'll be dead. I can already see the headlines of the Daily Prophet 'Golden Boy seen with the son of a Deatheater' come on." I saw him whine at the idea alone. But I so knew more about this ghost and history things than he did and I knew Lillian was right.

**A/N:** _I hope you enjoyed this first chapter… Next up will be a reunion of grandmother and grandson… Let's see how Draco thinks about this whole idea Lillian has…_


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